Teaching your Kids about Suspicion

 Teaching your Kids about Suspicion…
(Written on: 23rd August, 2010)    

Assalamu Alaikum,

I know this may seem like an odd or maybe even ‘uneventful’ topic to some. But the truth is…’Suspicion’ is something that taunts, tempts and tarnishes our minds and hearts on a daily basis. It is so easy to say out loud “I know he did so and so because of so and so!!!” and we make these statements in front of our children so casually that it goes un-noticed. We don’t even realize the evils of this practice and we don’t even realise the arrogance we are slowly placing into our children’s hearts when we allow them to accept this ‘norm’.

I am again, very serious about this topic, because again this is something that has affected me on a personal level…
No matter how much ‘possible evidence’ you have that would probably convict a person in court if that evidence was presented to a jury, the fact is that in Islam, if you didn’t see it happen and there are no witnesses…IT DIDN’T HAPPEN as far as you are concerned and Allah(swt) knows best. This is a hard thing to accept when you ‘know you are right’ and it takes a lot of patience and persistence everyday to just keep limping on and giving the wrong-doers the benefit of the doubt…believe me I know…but it is essential that we teach our children the importance of giving others ‘The benefit of the doubt’… This lesson is so incredibly crucial and is undoubtedly one of the major traits we must leave with our children so as to ensure a generation of young Muslims with strong minds and gentle hearts. How we treat others and speak about others, as Muslim parents, will directly affect the way our children will treat and speak about others Inshaa Allah.

Let us all learn to control our tongues, strengthen our will-power & soften our hearts Inshaa Allah… I of course include myself in this pact Inshaa Allah… May Allah(swt) give me the strength I need to put my trust in Him and have faith in His plan and to be satisfied with His justice for those who have wronged me and my family….Ameen…

That being said….we as the adults will understand ‘suspicion’ and may very well be able to implement measures to ensure that we controls our feelings towards others Inshaa Allah. But how do we teach this to our children???

Once again, this perfect religion has provided the answer…Alhamdulillah…I stumbled across an extract recently entitled “Ali, the Armor and the Christian”. It is the perfect story to read to children when attempting to teach them about suspicion and the correct way to approach situations where ‘you know you are right but you have no physical proof’. It is such an ideal extract about the Caliph Ali and how he handled a situation where he could have so easily fallen into ‘suspicion’ but choose the Islamic approach to the situation…Mashaa Allah….it was the most reassuring thing I have ever read in a long time and I believe if you take the time to read this to your children, they will have a greater understanding, inshaa Allah, of how Allah(swt) really does know what He is doing and that true justice lies only with Him…


“Alî, the Armor and the Christian”

During his Caliphate, ‘Alî b. Abî Tâlib  (Allah be pleased with him) saw some armor of his with a Christian. He decided to take the matter up legally, so he took the dispute to Shurayh (the Judge). ‘Alî said, “This is my armor, and I have not sold it nor given it away.” Shurayh said to the Christian, “What have you to say about what the Amîr of the Believers claims?” The Christian replied, “It is my armor, although I do not regard the Amîr of the Believers to be a liar.” Shurayh then turned to ‘Alî, “O Amîr of the Believers, do you have any proof (of ownership)?” ‘Alî laughed and said, “Shurayh is correct, I have no proof.” So Shurayh judged that the armor was the Christian’s. The Christian took it and began to walk away but then returned. He proclaimed, “As for me, I testify that this is the judgment of the Prophets – the Amîr of the Believers himself takes me to his judge and the judge rules against him! I bear witness that there is no deity deserving worship but Allâh and I bear witness that Muhammad is the Messenger of Allâh. By Allâh, the armor is yours o Amîr of the Believers. I followed the army when you were on your way to the Battle of Siffîn and the armor came out of your equipment.” ‘Alî said, “If you have accepted Islâm the armor is yours.” And then he put him on his horse. Al-Sha’bî (the reporter of this incident) said, “I was later informed by those who saw this man that he fought the Khawârij (alongside ‘Alî) at the battle of Nahrawân.” [Ibn Kathîr, Al-Bidâyah wa Al-Nihâyah Vol.8 p5.]

 “May Allah(swt) give us all the patience we need when dealing with others… Ameen…

 Yours Truly,


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